My challenge

I know I love to paint. I know I want more joy in my life. My goal with this blog is to achieve these two things in one personal challenge.

I painted a little when I was a kid. In fact, my painting of a nun on a cobblestone street is still hanging prominently in my dad's house. But I completely forgot I liked to paint. I had a career and kids and only after 50 was hit with a compelling urge to find what I really love to do.

Rediscovering art was an accident. A friend brought watercolors to a girls-only weekend retreat and insisted that we all paint. That was a beginning but the knowledge of my love for painting grew slowly. My daughter signed us up for a four-week art class and my typical determination and perfectionism didn't lead to great results; my first attempts were a disaster. But when I finally gave up my attempts at control I surprised myself with the first painting that I was really proud of. When I took it in to be framed the guy asked me who the artist was. I didn't know what to say. I didn't think of myself as an artist but I knew he was talking about me.

I hid my growing love of painting so no one would expect much. I took another class, but almost didn't make it through. I looked at the other students' masterpieces and almost cried every time I had to display mine for critique at the end of class. After several more months of self-doubt, I met a watercolor artist at an art fair whose work I loved. When I asked her if she would teach me, she revealed that she had only been painting a few years and that she did not feel qualified to teach. She actually said she was "terrible" when she first started. I couldn't believe it....maybe there was some hope for me!

That was my epiphany! I decided my goal is to have fun as an artist: whether I am good or not I want to learn from every brushstroke. Sometimes when I paint, I can feel an inner joy bubbling up, and I love it! Other times I don't feel inspired and I don't paint at all. I am wondering if the act of painting creates the inspiration or the other way around.

That leads me back to my challenge. I know I love to paint and I know I want more joy in my life. But can I successfully combine these goals? To answer this question I'm challenging myself to paint every day, with the intention of having fun and learning. What I observe and learn in the process is what I will write about and share.

Thanks for joining me.